Well, it’s about time — Fundamentalist Christian leaders stand up to Pat Robertson

Christian leaders have finally figured out that Pat Robertson makes them look real bad. And they’re finally speaking about it.

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I’m disappointed in Mike

Mike Adams recommends a college _not_ to attend, and it isn’t UNC-Chapel Hill. Damn, I thought he’d go after my alma mater first.

Paying attention to your breathing is a “New Age” belief?

LOL!

I think Called2Action is that group that organized the rent-a-mob to protest some gay rights action in Chapel Hill a couple of months ago. It seems their activities pretty much consist of complaining of any political activity that doesn’t involve merging fundamentalist Christianity and government.

Looks like calling for a leader’s head on a silver platter isn’t the only thing Pat’s up to

He’s also promoting an “age-defying” diet drink. The thing that makes this shady is that his organization has nonprofit status. This is just a bizarre story.

Jesus, government, oil, and now age-defying diet drinks. What next for one of the world’s largest evangelical Christian outfits?

Adams and Monroe never meant this?!

First, please take a look at the history of the “Monroe Doctrine”:http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Monroe_doctrine. Then, please tell me how does this justify the “assassination of a leader”:http://phillybri.blogspot.com/2005/08/man-of-god-calls-for-assassination-of.html of a sovereign nation?

I know, I know, the Monroe doctrine has been extended and twisted to justify a lot of stupid expansionist crap by our government. And it really doesn’t carry any legal weight whatsoever. It’s just an opinion expressed by a few early American politicians that says that European states should stay the hell out of the Americas.

Ok, pedantics aside, let’s take a look at part of Pat Robertson’s quote, which I swiped from “Brian’s Political Donnybrook”:http://phillybri.blogspot.com.

bq. And without question, this is a dangerous enemy to our south, controlling a huge pool of oil, that could hurt us very badly.

So this man is mixing oil, Jesus, and government. Mixing Jesus and government (or Allah and government, or the Goddess and government, or any other deity and government) is usually bad news, often lethal over the course of generations. Throw oil in there, or any other valuable scarce commodity, and you have a recipe for long-term suffering.

We can’t simply throw Chavez out of Venezuela, even if he were the avatar of Satan. We have rules of diplomacy and decency in this world, many of which the United States has stood for and defended over the years. It’s time to step back, assess the situation through some glasses other than violent jingoism (is that redundant?), and then take some honest steps to advance the cause of peace. And if you don’t like the dependence on Chavez’s oil, then fer cryin’ out loud help us find some alternative energy sources.

He’s upset because no one calls him

Mr. “I’m really a Dr., dammit” Mike Adams “bitches about cell phones”:http://www.townhall.com/columnists/mikeadams/ma20050715.shtml. Here are some choice excerpts:

bq. It probably all started when a 90-pound woman nearly hit me after she ran a stop-sign in her 6000-pound SUV. I don�t know that she weighed 90 pounds but I do know that she could barely see over the dashboard of her Expedition. A liberal friend of mine wants to blame the SUVs but I blame the cell phones. Of course, we could both be wrong. It might have been the latte she had in her other hand. At least I learned that I can still run really fast when I need to. I�m still trying to get the grass stains out of my jogging shorts.

I know what the answer is: she reads your Townhall.com columns.

bq. Or maybe it was the first time a cell phone went off in one of my classes. It would have been much better if the woman didn�t actually answer the cell phone.

You know, maybe things have changed in the intervening time since I was a teacher, but I remember one beautiful technique we had to deal with situations like this: classroom rules. You should try it sometimes. It’ll be hard as you and the students adjust to it, but it will be worth it in the end.

bq. But that wasn�t nearly as bad as the time a cell phone went off while a job candidate was giving a guest lecture in one of my classes. The guy with the cell phone did the noble thing and pretended it wasn�t his. After five rings, he was forced to pull it out and hit the �off� button. But everything worked out. We hired the candidate and avoided the lawsuit.

Ah yes, we find Mr., er, Dr. Mike’s driving motivation: avoiding lawsuits. “Threatening presidents of university systems”:http://www.townhall.com/columnists/mikeadams/ma20050707.shtml over a less than satisfactory performance evaluation isn’t the way to avoid a lawsuit, Mike!

We’ll skip some more because Mikey is really annoying.

bq. The last time that happened I knew the offender�s number. I thought about calling her back and saying, �This is God, yadda, yadda, and, by the way, you�re going to hell.� Of course the only thing that stood in the way of my plan was the fact that I don�t carry my cell phone to church. Maybe I�m not going to hell, like that one gay Christian tells me every time he sends me a hate mail.

It’s a good thing that you didn’t, because God really _doesn’t_ like to be impersonated. Especially people who try to impersonate him and threatening other people with hell. He sends people to hell for that, you know.

bq. Of course, part of the blame can be placed on a professor in my department.

That’s right, let’s blame every nutcase who yells “STUPID BIOTCH [sic]” on this professor in your department.

bq. His cell phone goes off every other faculty meeting (or so I�m told).

Why don’t you go to faculty meetings, like, say, every other member of faculty. Oh, that’s right, apparently the police told you to “stop going in 2001”:http://www.townhall.com/columnists/mikeadams/ma20050713.shtml. Those pesky police, screwing up your job every time.

bq. … And what exactly is a STUPID BIOTCH? …

Allow me to show you to the nearest mirror.

bq. And how about those deranged people who answer their cell phones during dinner at a restaurant? A girl once did that to me on our first date. Actually, it was our last date. I married a girl without a cell phone.

I’ve never had that happen. Maybe it’s because I’m so charming. (Or maybe because I was nearly married by the time my fiancée and I got cell phones.)

bq. I could go on and on, but there�s something buzzing in my left pocket. I don�t mean to be rude, but I�d better get this one. It could be really important.

How many times do I have to tell you to turn your vibrator off when you’re not using it? I mean, hauling that thing into public is so _rude_.

Shorter Boortz

If you don’t support Bush’s Social Security plan then you’re one of those people who would have rather been ruled by a king than declare independence from England in 1776. “Temporary link”:http://boortz.com/nuze/index.html. “Permanent link”:http://boortz.com/nuze/200507/07042005.html?

Boortz: what a disappointment. At one point he supported freedom and liberty. Now he supports Bush. A big 180, if you ask me.